A few thoughts from Steve Blair

      As I was scanning my online dating profile (yes he did) many things crossed my mind.  Here I am 40 y/o and have been realizing that dating is getting harder and harder these days????  Then it dawned on me that the older I get, the narrower the selection gets.  I now have to meet 50 crazy, over medicated, under medicated or under spanked women before finding 1 good one.  I've been looking heavily into astrology for guidance ever since a friend did a write up for me a year ago in September.  I was out fishing when she emailed it to me, so I ended up getting the write up late in the month.  One line in particular stood out to me and hit me over the head.  It was "September's first week. If you already have your children, at least one will likely have news to share, or your child will do something to make you proud."  in that week of September my oldest daughter got a hold of me for the first time in 16 years.  Also this was in the same reading "You may need to travel a short distance over the weekend of September 10-11 too, most likely for romantic fun, and if so, it's a great idea. Alternatively, you may be on the road to attend a wedding, birthday party, or other social event, and again, you'll be glad you accepted the invitation." I was invited to my 20 year class reunion and was all set to go when the plans fell through Sept. 11.  There was several other smaller things that were said that matched time and dates closely, and thoroughly convinced me I needed to dig deeper into astrology.
      I do know from painful experiences long past that me as an Aries/Taurus needs to avoid Cancers.  I now know that my fire/earth sign does not mix well with the water sign.  Recently I learned that for 40 years I have been wrong about Aquarius being a water sign.  Come to find out it is an air sign and I seem to get along with them quit nicely (I will update next week after my visit to a friend).  I will say this in defense of the women I have dated in the past, only a few of them qualified as crazy/psycho bitch status, the rest I will take the blame of being a first rate asshole.  I  seem to fall under the friend zone very nicely with high compliments in that aspect. 
       Ok getting back to the "DO NOTS" social networks I have come to realize are taboo to relationships.  I don't recommend you post anything personal for the world to see, especially if you are mad, drunk, high, in love, in lust, horny, or not in the mood.  I have found out the hard way that those words are almost as hard to take back as a drunken tattoo.  It also opens up your personal life and kills the mystery relationships need in order to survive.  I lost over 75 friends on facebook within a month of dating one girl???  Also you may want to try and spend more time with your girl, then your computer.  Women (and some sensitive men) get jealous over the smallest of things.  BTW yes I made these fatal mistakes miserably in the past.     In fact everyone loves my words of advice BECAUSE of how many mistakes I have made.
         I do know appreciation of the small things goes a long way, ONLY if the person you are appreciating is on the same level as you are.   This brings me to my theory about soul mates, where I don't believe so much it's a person more so then a time in two peoples lives when there BOTH ready to love and accept each other for who they are without trying to change one another.<----superb run on sentence.  I recently dated a woman that I was able to connect with both physically, mentally, socially, ect ect.  The only problem was she was at a stage in her life that I had been at roughly 12-14 years before.  It was very scary how our lives mirrored the other so precisely.  I saw the anger inside her she had for her ex, and how it affected her life.  I had the very same anger for my ex wife, and carried that anger for many years.  It got in the way of life so many times.  I didn't learn about the magical word of forgiveness until many years later.  Had I known about the true definition while dealing with my ex and all her games, I would have never lost my daughter.  Everyone mistakenly thinks forgiving someone is letting them off the hook for what they did bad, when that's the furthest from the truth.  Forgiveness is you taking any and all power away from someone else that they hold over you.  One second you are mad, spiteful, resentful, or anything other then content towards another person, is a second they took from you and did not deserve.  Everyone claims they forgive another person, until they see that person or start talking about the past.  I watched a simple smile on her exes face bother her all day long.  Bottom line is I feel it's important to find someone who is at the same point in there life as you are, otherwise you risk the chance of reinventing the wheel.
        That leads me to my next big mistake I always make.  DON'T TRY TO FIX PEOPLE!!!!  Hang up your captain save a hoe cape.  If there broken when they get there, odds are they will be broken when they leave.  When you meet someone you need to look long and hard at them right off the bat, and either love them for all there good and bad.  We all do it in some form or another in life, just know it's not good.  You may as well say to them "I love you honey, IF you work out more, or made more money, or got a boob job, weren't so psycho".  I will admit that a good woman completes a good man and makes for an unstoppable pair.  But seeing as you were single for a reason going into the relationship, means you need to worry about you, not them.